I picked up Jeff from Allen Samuels where he dropped off his car for an oil change. Almost immediately after entering my car, Jeff farts, lemme tell you, the aroma was not the least bit pleasant. I roll down the window and chastise him. He laughs. We continue our drive to the doctor's office, and he farts again! I am annoyed and my nose is offended--Jeff laughs and blames it on the Fiber One bar he consumed earlier that day.
We arrive at Dr. K's office at which point I set up my next regular appointment and ultrasound. The nurse then instructs me to pee into a cup using the bathroom attached to her workspace. I do as I'm told, and when I attempt to exit the bathroom, ol' Jeffie is blocking my way out in this narrow workspace. I ask him to move, so that I can get out and continue on with the appointment. As I make my way out, my nose is once again alerted to an all too familiar odor. Jeff farted again, and this time, I was not the only ungrateful recipient of this offensive "gift!" I'm sure the nurse thought I was the bearer of bad smells, because she immediately walked away with a comment that she either needed to ask someone a quick question or something like that.
So, I sit down in my usual chair to get in position for my blood pressure check upon her return. Jeff sits in the nurse's chair, and we gaze around at the baby pictures of past patients of Dr. K. Out of nowhere, another nurse buzzes our nurse's phone and says, "Christy?" My mature and serious husband turns his head to the phone on the wall and in his best matronly voice replies, "mmm hmmmm," as if he were prepared to continue this charade and answer whatever question the other nurse had for nurse Christy. I wish I had a snapshot of the look on his face at this moment, and then another snapshot to compare with the mortified look on my face! The other nurse replies to Christy-Jeff asking if he/she has a second or if he/she is with a patient. As my husband begins to quietly giggle and open his mouth for another chance to embarass me, I quickly reply, "Sorry, she is in another room with Dr. Koeritz at the moment!" Jeff began to laugh, I chastised him for impersonating a medical professional, and then I gave in to the laughter, too. I am lucky that this husband of mine that is capable of driving me nuts (in a good way) is also quite capable of cracking me up.
When we moved a couple minutes later from the nurse's workspace to room next door to await Dr. K, Jeff farted one more time for old times' sake, I suppose. ;) I will have to remember to hide the Fiber One bars before our next appointment in May!
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