Have you seen this child?

It was a rather ordinary day. A Wednesday, perhaps? Harper and I were hanging out in the living room on her new Crayola-colored foam floor mats along with an assortment of toys. I had to pee, so I exited stage left to the nearest restroom.

I was gone for a maximum of 37 seconds, I swear. As I reentered the living room, a flurry of thoughts careened through my head.

Where is Harper? Weren't we just in the living room? On the mats, right? She was sitting up on the green square--or was it the yellow square--attempting to eat her plastic snail teething toy, wasn't she? Am I losing my mind? Is it time for lunch yet? (Editor's note: I am easily distracted and often hungry.) We were in the living room, I know it! I didn't hear a door open, so I'm assuming no one stole my baby. Right? Where is she?!?!

Oh, there she is. Under the couch. Duh!